Last week was a very rough week for me.When Hayden starts showing side effects of the meds shes on, I get stressed. And that's what happened ...i didn't want to call the doctor right away cause i wanted to see if we could make it..well after about a week straight of her being so tired,looking so sick,and being a total and complete grump,i called the doctor,they switched her to ethambutol. Being on this antibiotic means that Hayden will have to start seeing an eye doctor simply because this med can mess with your vision.I asked the dr allot of questions about this ...things like "what are the long term risks?If it would do something to her eyes would it go away when she goes off of it?" She said so far they have not seen long term effects,since they have always caught it as soon as it started to mess with your vision(hence the seeing an eye doctor regularly)I really didn't want to put her on this stuff,cause i didn't want to have one more doctor to see,have a whole new set of bills and im a little worried about how they are going to check her eyes.But she is now on it and after 4 days of going off the other stuff i started seeing a huge difference in her.PTL! Shes back to her happy self,shes still tired allot,but not as much as she was and other then being a little skinny(shes petite the way it is,but the meds have taken her appetite away a lot)she looks healthy.After consulting her doctor i started Hayden on a pro biotic my sister gave me to try called plexus.I also started taking it and have noticed a difference in myself,my appetite and just over all how i feel..Im praying that it helps Hayden as well.
The past year i have been struggleing with my skin.I never had any problems with it before but over Christmas i started breaking out in a rash on my arm, the dr said it was an allergic reaction to something ,put me on sterroids and a few weeks later in went away,it comes and goes now,and i do have to be careful what kind of soaps i use,but im noticing a patern...it seems to get really bad when i get stressed..and last week it was really bad.I have been soo busy the past couple weeks and it wont be slowing down for another couple weeks...last week i just couldn't seem to get time to sit down and have my Jesus time.The more i didn't get my Jesus time,the more stressed i became.finally one day,between the business i was driving to the store,i turned off my music and i just prayed...i named everything that was stressing me and just said "Jesus i give this to you,im not taking it anymore." My prayer was short,it was not a long ,worded prayer.It was simple.2 days later i seen my rash get noticeably smaller and today its almost completely gone. As i looked at my arm the other day and just said thank you God,it came to me...God doesn't need an all out prayer,it dont have to be a 30 minute thing, and sometimes all i need to say is "Jesus" and he knows....and he starts to work,cause that's my surrender,that "Jesus" is me surrendering,and that's when He steps in and takes over. Thank you Jesus!!!Because of this,my song all week has been "Multiplied" by need to breathe,although ive been listening to daves highway sing it(do yourself a favor and listen to these kids sing this song...so moving!)It says in the song ""God of mercy,sweet love of mine,I have SURRENDERED to your design,May this offering stretch across the sky.These hallelujahs be multiplied"
The meaning of the title of this post "somewhere in the midst of this storm" is cause that's just how i feel right now...like were in the midst of it somewhere....i have cried to a few people over the past couple weeks of how long this all has been going on and how long we have to go yet...but God is giving grace and continues to remind me "one day at a time"and on the days i feel i cant catch my breath...He carries me.
I have had so many people ask over the past couple weeks,"how is it having your husband home all the time?" :)That's a good question. My answer is , he is not driving me crazy:)On sunday the kids and i stayed home from church with our dog(her hip popped out of place last week so she had her one leg bandaged up to her belly,making it almost impossible for her to walk let alone go potty..it was interesting!)anyways,Matt went alone and after he left i took a deep breath and was reminded how nice it is to have the house to ourselves..i told him this later and said please dont take offence by this,nothing against you at all!But that was just so good for me!
I do feel that we have to be so much more intentional about our love,our marriage.I say intentional meaning,its so easy for me to just go about my day,doing my thing,with him just here. At first it wasn't like this,but now,i have to remind myself to show love,to feel loved. This month was both our anniversary and Matts birthday,and with all this in mind we made an appoint to go out just us for both of those.And both times it was just so good to connect like that again,outside of the house,away from the kids,and just go on a date.
We are being taken care of...i cannot even tell you how amazing it has been seeing the people who have given to us,people that we haven't seen for years,but God laid it on their hearts...today as i was reading a letter someone sent i just started sobbing as they said "You have been on our hearts and minds continually and lift you up as often as he Lord brings you to mind..."and then said "we wanted to encourage you and let you know how many people are praying for you."i took the letter to Matt ,with tears in my eyes.My Jesus knows just what i need!! We cannot say thank you enough..really!!I told Matt today,i started thinkin about what we would do ,if our church,family and friends weren't helping us out while Matts off work,really,what would we do?It made me panicky to think that there are people in that situation.And again it made me oh so very gratefull.We also got letter from a couple who have been in our situation as far as having the man of the home injured and out of work for a few months,they sent some money and for some reason,that just blessed me and got me excited,not to think that someday someone else will be in Matts shoes,but to think that we will get our chance to give as well...and i have a whole new look at giving!
Hayden turned 2 on September 18th,We had her party sunday night and it was a blast.We had quite a few people there,since i dont have my family here i usually like to invite some people to fill in for my side:)this year those people were,our neighbors,who my kids absolutely adore,my closest friend and her family,and Matts cousins family.Hayden had so much fun and was so pleased with all her present and her nemo cake which shes been asking for for weeks now:)
The next couple of weeks are so crazy for us,tomorow we leave for church camping.I am soo excited about this,i love church camping and cant wait to go again after 2 years of not going. We come home from that on sunday, and on Tues. we are leaving for florida for a week.Our pastors son Landon is getting married on sat down there ,hes likea brother to me,and the kids are both in the wedding and i am co-ordinating it.My parents moved to florida 2 weeks ago,so were excited we get to stay with them for a whole week:)Tuesday Hayden also has her first dr appointment with the eye doctor and then from there shes going to see dr lacroix(infectious disease dr.) so we decided we'll pack up our bags Tuesday morning,go to Greenville to Haydens appointments and then drive straight to florida,oh did i menion before we leave for Haydens appointments Matt has therapy?!We sure could use some extra prayers that day:) We get home from florida (on tues or wed.)and then that weekend is our womens conference at our church which i am helping on the worship team and drama team,and i think my sister in law will be here that weekend as well(hopefully she can keep me sane!:))A few days after womens conference we are taking care of our nieces for a little over a week while Matts sister and her husband go to Israel. Throw in a few doctor appointments,meetings,therapy and runs t the pharmacy and you got B-U-S-Y:)
I hope to be able to post again sometime next week after Haydens appointments but with all this business i dont know if i will get to..
We so appreciate you love support and prayers!
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